With Wind at Our Heels
by Beth Pryor
Summary: Following the conclusion of "Eyes That Know Me," Auggie isn't ready to head back home just yet. This explores how he finds his way back. This multi-chapter fic will also feature a meeting with some other favorites in Chicago and beyond before A&A wrap up their time away.
1. Chapter 1

**Title: With Wind at Our Heels**

**Author:** Beth Pryor

**Rating:** K+

**Summary:** Following the conclusion of "Eyes That Know Me," Auggie isn't ready to head back home just yet. This explores how he finds his way back. This multi-chapter fic will also feature a meeting with some of our favorites from Engine Co. 51 of Chicago Fire fame.

**Disclaimer:** Covert Affairs and its characters belong to the USA Network. Chicago Fire belongs to NBC, but they'll probably screw that up somehow.

**Universe:** Follows the Covert Affairs Season 4 universe of my previous story "Eyes That Know Me" and is very close to canon for Season 2 of Chicago Fire up until the mid season break, with the exception of Jeff Clarke's arrest for suspicion of murder.

**A/N:** This came as a little idea for a companion piece to the Anderson Trilogy, but the longer I kept Annie and Auggie in Chicago, the more I longed to have them interact with some of my other favorites who live in the city. And really, isn't that why we write fanfic?

* * *

**With Wind at Our Heels**

Souls like the wheels  
Turning, taking us with wind at our heels  
Burning, making us decide on what we're giving  
Change this way of living

One little song  
give me strength to the leave the sad and the wrong  
buried safely in the past where I've been living  
Alive but unforgiving…

"Souls Like the Wheels" by the Avett Brothers

Chapter 1

In the days following Christmas, he felt Annie beginning to fidget. She needed to get back. But she was right – he wasn't ready. At her previous suggestion, he'd been toying with the idea of asking Max to tag along on the trip back west when his brother sought him out two days after Christmas.

Auggie was sitting on his bed, having just finished making it when Max knocked on the door frame. "Got a minute?" he asked.

"Sure. Come in," Auggie offered. "What's on your mind?"

Max took a seat beside him. "If I'm totally off base here, just disregard everything I'm about to say."

"Okay," Auggie apprehensively agreed.

"What would you say if I asked you to come back with me for a while? Sam apparently has a lead on a story and is heading back east and then back into the field. I need to head back to Nevada to finish up a few things and pack up my place. And it seems like maybe you're not ready to go back yet."

Auggie smiled at his brother. "Did Annie put you up to this?"

"No why?"

"She had the same idea. I've been working up the courage to ask you to take me with you for a couple of days now." He revealed.

Max clapped him on the shoulder. "Excellent! I have to warn you that my place is basically a disaster area, and I'm going to deputize you to help with the packing."

"I'm not a great sorter these days," Auggie pointed out, waving a hand in front of his own face.

"You can still tape. And stack, right?"

"I guess so."

"Good enough," decided Max. "We'll figure it out, I'm sure."

"When are you heading out?" Auggie asked, trying to put this all together in his head.

"The third. Will that work for you?"

Auggie nodded. "Sure. Annie's heading back on the second."

"You guys have New Year's plans?"

Auggie shrugged and shook his head all in one motion. "Not really. We were going to see what everyone else was up to. Why?"

"Do you remember a guy named Jeff Clarke who wrestled in our conference? He went to Waukegan and graduated the same year as me."

"That name sounds familiar." But like most of his acquaintances from decades ago, he couldn't call up a memory of this person.

"He was state champion in 1993 and 1994. I think he was a weight class above you each year." Max attempted to give him a frame of reference.

"Wow. Seems like you remember him well," Auggie paused. "You weren't, I mean…" He felt his cheeks warming.

"What? No." Max chuckled. "I'd expect that question to come from Troy."

"Sorry." Auggie winced.

"Don't worry about it, but no. I spent some time with him and some other guys from Waukegan that summer when I worked at the marina. He was from Michigan or Wisconsin and his mom's husband moved them over here the summer before junior year.

He was a great hockey player, too. He played like two years at Minnesota and then kicked around the AHL for a couple more before he joined the Marines."

"Did you keep in touch over the years?" inquired Auggie.

"Not really. I ran into him a few years ago when I was in town and we caught up a little."

"And that prompted all of this?"

"Actually, no. He's a fireman. There was a fire in the building across the street from Troy's office yesterday, and Jeff was one of the guys responding. As they were packing up, he saw Troy on the street and thought he was me. They started talking. Turns out some of his buddies own a bar near their firehouse, and they invited us to their New Year's party. Sam, Troy, Leah and I are going, and we were hoping that you and Annie would come, too."

"I'll ask her, but I'm sure she'll be game." He paused. "What about the others?"

"Rhett and Ruth had another party invitation, and Brendan and Dana are letting the boys have a co-ed sleepover."

Auggie gasped. "What!"

"Separate sleeping areas, but yeah, I know. Scandalous." Max finished with a chuckle as he imagined his brother and sister-in-law patrolling the hallway all night long.

"How is it that you've been here like 3 days and know everything that is going on?" Auggie laughed with another bewildered shake of his head.

"I just have one of those faces that people just open up to, I guess," decided Max.

Auggie's brow crinkled a little. "Has it changed since the last time I saw it?"

Max shoved him. "Very funny."

Auggie laughed again for a second, then stopped and sighed.

"What?"

"Are you sure I'm not going to be more of a hindrance than a help?" His mind was already drifting back to packing up Max's apartment.

"I don't know, Aug. You'll probably break my favorite lamp or something, but I want you there. I'd like to spend some time together, just the two of us." Max placed his hand on his brother's knee as he tried to convey the strength of his feelings.

"You have a favorite lamp?" Auggie quipped.

Max sighed. "You're missing the point."

"He's just being difficult." Annie pointed out from her position in the doorway.

"How long have you been standing there?" Auggie inquired a little more sharply than he'd intended, but she almost never managed to sneak up on him.

"Just a minute or two." She assured before she directed her words toward Max. "Sorry to eavesdrop, but this sounds like a wonderful idea."

Max stood up. "Which part?"

Annie smiled as she moved toward Auggie. "All of it. Leah just called me about the New Year's party, and then I heard the rest on the way up to find you," she explained as she took the seat beside him that Max had just vacated.

"We'll firm up plans later, Auggie," Max decided as he headed toward the door. "I'm gonna see what's going on downstairs."

"Okay," Auggie agreed before he turned to Annie. "What's up?"

"Did Teo say how they're spelling the baby's name? Is it MacKenzie or McKenzie or something else?" The two men had talked by phone a little earlier in the day.

Auggie shook his head. "It didn't really come up. Why?"

"I thought we should send a gift," she revealed as her fingers trailed down his arm to his hand.

"Or you could just stop by when you get back," he suggested with a squeeze of her hand.

She leaned against him. "I'm glad you're going with Max."

"Trying to get rid of me, are you?" he asked playfully, as he pulled back from her with a smile on his face.

She reached forward and kissed him now. "No. I'm not." It took a good bit of willpower to keep her from inching him all the way back onto the bed, but she withstood the temptation. "Anything but that, actually. I want you to take the time you need and come back when you're ready. And we'll go from there."

"Like, if you love someone let them go and if it's meant to be they'll come back to you?"

She kissed him again. "Sort of. But you were supposed to have some time to relax, and a week in the ICU isn't very relaxing for anyone."

"I feel good, though," he protested.

"Take some time, Auggie. You don't have to rush back." Annie rubbed his arm. "What did Teo say?"

"Not much. We made plans to talk when I get back. He's interested for sure, and he thinks Arthur will be too, but everyone's a bit tied up with the baby and all that right now." He smiled at the recollection of his conversation with Teo. "Sounds like that kid has them all wrapped already."

"Doesn't take much for babies to wiggle their way in."

"Do you want one? Soon, I mean," he asked, almost in a whisper.

Annie adjusted her position on the bed. "Oh no. We're not getting into this now, and we're not going to discuss my job."

"I know, and that's not what I want either. I'm just saying that when you're ready, I will be, too."

"Like now?" she asked.

He shrugged. "I'm not getting any younger."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I'm feeling very mortal these days." He shook his head as he appeared to focus on the floor. "Maybe it doesn't matter how dangerous your day job is."

"But maybe it does." She wasn't dying to let him know that he'd made some valid points in Costa Rica

"I'm not trying to keep you out of the field." He needed her to know this.

"I know you aren't, but maybe I should think about other ways to show my value at the Agency. I'm going to talk to Joan and Calder about some other options when I get back."

He didn't want her to limit herself while they were still making decisions. "You have time."

She rubbed his arm again. "I'd like to get their input. Joan's anyway."

"Maybe do it outside of work and keep everything off-book for now?" He felt this would be a fair compromise.

"Yeah." She kissed his cheek as she stood. "That makes sense."

"Where are you going?"

"Leah's. I'm guessing you can imagine how infrequently one gets out of the house while raising three small children. She is struggling to contain her excitement over this New Year's party."

"Then by all means, let her dress you up again. I very much enjoy removing her finery from your body," he finished with a smirk.

"You're terrible."

He raised his eyebrows. "You have no idea."

She laughed. "I think I'm starting to get the picture." She started toward the door, but he reached toward her, his hand brushing her arm.

"And Annie?" he added, "That perfume of Leah's from the other night, can you wear that?"

She laughed again as she took a step toward the door.

"Wait!" he called after her, standing from the bed. "I might as well come with you. She's unlikely to let me go out the same outfit twice," he realized as he broke into a grin and fell in step beside her.

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Four days later, they piled into Troy and Leah's SUV – minus the car seats – and headed toward the city. Leah had again provided an ensemble for Annie, this time a bias-cut tank with a few spots of sequins over skinny jeans topped off with a motorcycle jacket. She wore the tall boots again. And the perfume. They'd allowed Auggie to get away with dark blue jeans and a button down with a v-neck sweater.

He and Annie had climbed into the back, leaving Max and Sam in the middle. He tried to relax as they drove; he'd even taken a shot of Patrón back at the house, but this never really got any easier. Most times, he played the role of willing partygoer fairly well, he thought, but the idea of a crowded bar and God knows how many people he didn't know unnerved him more than usual tonight. And he knew he'd handle it all with much less anxiety if he was at least a little tipsy.

Annie knew, too. Her hand found his as he started to pick at a string on his coat. "We can leave earlier than the others if you want. We're going to stop at the hotel first, so we can even stay there."

He loved her for that but shook his head. "It's fine. I'll be fine." She wasn't missing out on New Year's with everyone because crowds still made him squirrelly. He knew he hadn't been too terribly convincing, but she also knew enough to leave it alone.

After checking into their hotel rooms and dropping off overnight bags, they grabbed a cab out front and headed to the bar – a quaint little place called Molly's. Max texted Jeff just before they arrived, and he was waiting for them out front. Music wafted into the street as the door opened every now and then as Max made introductions.

"These are my brothers Troy and Auggie, Troy's wife Leah, Auggie's fiancée Annie, and my fiancé Sam."

Clarke nodded. "Glad you all could make it." He tipped his head toward the door. "Shall we?" The group voiced their agreement and followed Jeff into the bar.

"This door is beautiful," Leah mused as they stepped through the entryway. "Oh! What a great space," she exclaimed as she entered.

There were about 50 people on the inside, mostly work buddies and their friends, at the private party. Auggie gripped Annie's arm a little more tightly as they moved through the room.

"Why don't we find a table and then we can branch out from there?" Annie suggested to the others.

Max spotted an empty spot at the back of the bar that would accommodate them all and secured it. They shrugged out of coats as a man and woman approached the table. Jeff turned to introduce the Anderson crew to Matt Casey and Gabby Dawson. They soon learned that Dawson was a paramedic and one of the bar's owners and that she and Casey, a Chicago FD Lieutenant, had arrived together and were announcing their relationship publicly for the first time.

Max and Jeff left to grab the first round of drinks while Sam, Troy, and Leah fell into easy conversation with the other couple. Annie leaned against Auggie's arm.

"You look about as calm as a caged tiger," she whispered. "Try to relax."

"I _am_ trying," he hissed back.

"Then maybe _don't_ try so hard?" she reasoned. She tried to take his mind off of things by describing their surroundings. "This place is great. Not too big but roomy, and the number of people isn't overwhelming. Everyone's milling around, mingling. But I guess most everyone knows each other, right?

"The bar wraps almost all the way around the far wall, and the ceiling is exposed beams with what looks like thousands of icicle lights. It practically glows in here. There are mirrored cabinets with glass doors behind the bar where they have glasses and bottles lined up on display. It has a real vintage but hip feel. We need a place like this at home. This puts Allen's to shame," she concluded. She felt Auggie's taut muscles loosen a little beneath her hands, but he kept his jaw clenched tightly. "Do you want me to see where Max is with your drink?"

He took a couple of deep breaths and closed his eyes as he exhaled. "It's okay." He needed her to stay beside him.

She hadn't seen him this rattled in a long time, and he'd been fine last week when they went out with Ben Rosen and his wife. She craned her neck to see if Max and Clarke were making any progress on the drinks. She finally found them at the bar, seemingly deep in conversation. She sat back and rubbed Auggie's arm. "They'll be here soon," she hoped.

"Your younger brother, the one who wrestled…" started Jeff as he and Max waited for the bartender – a temp for the evening so all the owners could enjoy the festivities – prepared their drinks.

"Iraq," Max finished for him.

"Shit."

"Yeah."

"How's he doing?" Clarke inquired.

"He's managed to make a good life for himself." Max shot a glance back toward his brother. Auggie hadn't seemed as sure of himself this evening as he had during their other interactions over the past two months. Max realized yet again how little he knew about his brother.

"He looks a little peaked tonight," Clarke pointed out, wanting to believe Max's story, but the visual evidence seemed to prove otherwise.

Max nodded. "He and Annie were on vacation in Central America before they got here. He ended up with dengue and a week-long hospital stay. He's only up to about half speed right now."

"Okay," Clarke conceded. "And Annie. Did he, um, know her before?"

"No. They met a couple of years afterward and just got engaged at Thanksgiving."

"Hm." Clarke accepted a tray of drinks from the bartender.

Max grabbed the rest. "They're good together."

"Coming back is hard," Jeff mused as they started toward the table. "I'm glad you've both found someone who understands all of that," he finished wistfully.

They arrived at the table before Max could reply to that. They were met by Kelly Severide, a Lieutenant on the same Rescue Squad as Jeff and Leslie Shay, another paramedic in their house. Clarke again passed out drinks and introductions as Severide took the seat beside Auggie.

"Clarke, we weren't sure you actually had any friends, but these people all look nice and normal. You're holding out on us," Kelly ribbed.

Jeff smiled but didn't say anything.

"Are you guys all Marines, too?" Shay asked with a mischievous grin.

"I'm Navy – mostly retired," Max answered. "Auggie was Army. Sam's sometimes an embedded journalist, Leah gave up cleaning teeth to stay home with her kids, Annie cleans dinosaur teeth at the Smithsonian, and Troy was in a frat," he finished with a smile.

That brought a laugh from the table. "I hate to break up your comedy routine, Max," Troy interjected, "But there are no fraternities at Notre Dame." This drew an even bigger laugh.

"So you still haven't convinced us that you didn't rent these people for the evening, Clarke," Severide continued.

"Max and I knew each other in high school. And he has a lot of brothers," was Jeff's final answer.

"We do tend to roll in packs," Auggie added. He'd downed most of his beer as soon as he'd gotten his hands on it. He could feel it and the tequila warming him, breaking through some of the anxiety. He both appreciated and despised that realization.

Annie couldn't help but notice Severide's eyes examining her, and he didn't look away when she caught him. "Are you two also an item?" she asked him, motioning to Shay who had moved over beside Sam.

"I'm not exactly her type," he noted, eyes still fixed on Annie.

"And what would that be?"

"Her type?"

"Yeah."

"Well, you. But less put together." Severide grinned, and even though he annoyed her a bit, she couldn't deny his brazen charm.

"I heard that, Kelly," Shay called from across the table.

His attention finally wrested from Annie, Kelly turned to Auggie. "So, you were Army. What are you now?"

"Blind." Auggie said without thinking.

Severide opened his mouth and nothing else came out for a few seconds before coughing out a couple of words. "Oh, I mean…"

Auggie chuckled as Annie jabbed him in the side. "Sorry, Man. That wasn't fair, but it gets people every time."

Kelly took a drink of his beer. "I can imagine."

"I'm in web developing and network security these days," Auggie offered.

"So you're the IT guy."

"Something like that."

"And did you know Clarke growing up or just your brother?"

Auggie shrugged. "Apparently we wrestled together, but I don't remember him. Although I could pin him and see if he feels familiar."

Kelly, and Shay and Sam who had drifted back into their part of the conversation, found this quite amusing.

After a few more minutes of small talk, Severide stood and placed his hand on Auggie's shoulder. "You're alright, Anderson. Even if Clarke did find you on the street somewhere."

They shook hands and Annie gave him a nod and a polite smile as he moved on to another table. Shay stuck around a little bit longer, demanding to know where Annie had gotten every piece of her outfit, before she also trailed off. First Dawson, and then Casey, who had already made another lap around the bar together migrated over to take the places their colleagues had just left.

"I usually feel the need to apologize to strangers for whatever Severide just said or did. I hope that's not the case," Casey greeted them with a grin.

"And if not him, then Shay," Dawson added.

"They weren't too badly behaved," Annie offered.

"And we can hold our own," Auggie revealed.

"Good." Casey smiled again, his face warm and inviting. Annie noticed that Dawson had barely left his side all night. New love, she assumed. "Can I get you guys another round?" Casey asked, holding up his own empty glass.

Annie glanced at her own nearly finished drink and knew that Auggie's bottle had long been drained. "I think we're ready for another, but this one's on us." She stood from her seat. "And Gabby and I will make the bar run." As she moved by Auggie and then behind Matt Casey, she noted the still healing incision that was still visible through his short, light hair. The edge extended slightly past his hairline down his neck as well. Gabby smiled at him as she also stood, kissing Matt's cheek just before she joined Annie at the bar.

"I'm kind of smitten," Gabby confessed after they'd put in their drink orders.

"Don't worry. It only shows a little, and it's pretty cute. But how can you watch him run into burning buildings?"

"I try not to watch."

"And how's that working out for you?" Annie asked.

"Not well," Gabby admitted. They both laughed.

Annie leaned against the bar. "How long ago was his surgery?"

Gabby swallowed hard. "You saw that?"

"I'm pretty observant."

"Four weeks ago. He's still not back to work." Gabby reached for a cocktail napkin left on the bar and started ripping it into little strands.

"I didn't know Auggie before, so I didn't have to put up with him being gone and not knowing if he'd come back. I definitely don't envy you that," Annie confided.

"It would be nice to know Matt was safely in an office somewhere, I guess, but then he wouldn't be him." Gabby shrugged as she continued to demolish the napkin.

"Or he'd just be a new version of him." Annie spoke so softly she almost didn't hear her own words.

"Oh, God. I'm sorry. I didn't mean…" Gabby dropped the ball of paper onto the bar's surface.

"It's okay. And there's plenty of danger to go around when he crosses the street by himself." Annie gave Gabby a sad little smile. "He used to live a very different life than he does now, and most days he's okay with it, but it took a long time to get there."

"Having someone special in his life must help," Gabby assumed.

Annie sighed. "Not always. We work together, and sometimes my responsibilities are ones that would have been his before. He enjoys his job now, and he's a wealth of information, but I know that being with me isn't always easy for him in that regard."

Gabby shook her head and smiled. "I'm so glad you're here tonight, Annie."

"Why's that?"

"I'm starting at the Fire Academy next week. I'm going to be a firefighter, and even before, Matt didn't love the idea. But now…"

"He'll be cleared to go back to work, though. Right?"

Gabby nodded. "Yeah. But he'll still worry."

Annie shrugged. "If he loves you, he worries already. Just give him time. And don't expect him to be your only means of support. Hearing about the things that worry or concern you that he can't do anything about will only frustrate him more." Annie wished she could tell Gabby the truth about her and Auggie. "And that is amazing, by the way. Good for you!"

"I keep thinking maybe I'm a little, or a lot, crazy."

Annie grinned, genuinely excited for Gabby. "Probably, but it's exciting nonetheless."

The bartender handed them their drinks – club soda for the still recovering Casey and beer for Auggie, who was putting it away far too fast to be trusted with liquor.

* * *

"Your girl seems great," Casey started as he watched Annie and Gabby walk toward the bar. He knew Gabby had been sticking close by tonight, and he appreciated it, but it was nice to have a little breathing room, too.

"Yours too," Auggie reciprocated.

"She's hovering a little tonight."

"Oh yeah?"

Matt chided himself for opening this conversation, but his mouth had been working a little bit independently of his brain recently. "I, um, was injured a few weeks ago. I'm not quite where I need to be yet."

"What'd you hurt?" Auggie couldn't detect any differences in Casey's movements compared to the others.

"My head."

"Ah, well." Auggie wished he had a drink right now.

"Sorry, I'm not sure why I brought that up."

Auggie shrugged. "You think this is the first time some guy's come up to me in a bar and asked how long it's going to take until he feels normal again?"

"Is it?"

"Well, not in so many words usually, but sometimes I feel like I should be serving drinks and collecting tips." Casey chuckled and Auggie smiled. "My answer isn't any different from what anyone else is telling you, though. It takes time. And you have to take it slow."

Casey nodded. "I think it's the waiting that's driving me crazy, but if I push it at all, I'm just back where I started."

"What's bothering you the most?" He recalled his own conversations with Ben Rosen on the same subject.

"There are gaps in my days – then, now even." Casey's voice wavered a bit at this revelation.

Auggie nodded. "You're used to being able to trust your body, and you can't right now. But you can't rush it. Believe me, I know how much you want to fix it and get things back to the way they were. But the more you fight here, the further under you slip."

"Like quicksand," mused Casey.

"That's a pretty accurate comparison." Auggie placed his forearms on the table.

"How did Annie deal with that?"

"I met her a lot later. Which isn't to say there aren't times now when I'm overwhelmed, but it isn't the same as right afterward." Auggie turned the focus back to Matt. "You have to tell Gabby what you need from her, but she also has to know what doesn't help. One of the most important lessons I learned was that people are willing to do whatever they can, but they can't read your mind."

"Thanks. Just seeing you sitting here, not sweating and ready to jump out of your seat makes me think there's hope," Casey sighed.

Auggie laughed and shook his head. "You should have seen me about 15 minutes ago."

TBC

* * *

A/N: Hey, the gang's all here! Thanks so much for the reviews. I'm mapping this one out now, so your ideas can definitely shape where we go from here.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

"Wanna dance?" Auggie asked, his mouth close to Annie's ear a few moments after she returned to her seat.

She looked up. A space on the far side of the bar had suddenly cleared into an impromptu dance floor. "How did you know that other people were dancing?"

He shrugged as he stood, taking her answer as an affirmative one. "I didn't. I just like this song." She linked her fingers with his as they moved across the floor. When they reached the edge of the others, she snaked her arms behind his neck as he pulled her body close to his.

"Acoustic Radiohead, huh? You never cease to amaze me."

"That's the plan." His hands slipped a little lower on her bottom.

"You're drunk."

"Not quite, but getting there," he quipped. "Slowly, though. Thanks to you."

"I have plans for later."

His eyes widened. "Well, I can look forward to that."

"This hasn't been so bad, has it?" she queried, her fingers twisting in the curls at the base of his neck. "You and Matt Casey seemed to be getting along okay."

"It's been fine." He exhaled. "I'm sorry about earlier and that an evening out with me has a two drink minimum."

She rested her head on his shoulder, breathing in his fresh, clean scent now mingling with beer with just the faintest hint of nervous sweat lingering. Her mind drifted to all the times he'd come to her rescue in the field. She may have never made it out of Paris, Argentina, Sweden, Russia or Amsterdam if it wasn't for him. "It's not like this when we're working, though." The confidence he exuded in every moment of his professional life – including his occasional foray into the field – wavered significantly when there wasn't an international operation on the line. "It's like you're a different person sometimes." One hand released his neck and flew to her mouth. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that," she whispered through splayed fingers.

His closed his eyes, jaw clenched tightly and released her body. "Shit, Annie." He'd feared this moment for as long as he'd known her. He took a step backwards but realized that he wouldn't make it back very easily without her.

That fact hadn't yet registered with Annie. Her hands grabbed his and drew them toward her chest. "No, Auggie. Wait. I didn't mean that the way it came out. "

He liberated his arms from hers and dropped them fecklessly to his sides. "I _am_ a different person when I'm working. And sometimes when it's just me, or us now, I just can't be that other guy all the time. I'm _not_ that guy anymore, not really." He shook his head in disgust of his own words, as if he admitting his own perceived weaknesses out loud made him more fallible.

"It's okay." She leaned against him, her forearms pressing into his chest, but he couldn't return the closeness of her embrace.

"It's not okay, and it's not what I want for you." He'd been trying to get this point through her stubborn head since the first time they'd kissed. He wasn't in her league anymore.

"Listen to me. Please." She reached her fingers upward and cupped his face in her palms. "As long as you're on your game when your game is getting me out of whatever crazy situation I've gotten myself into, the rest is negotiable as far as I'm concerned. And I know it has to take more than two drinks for Ruth to get a slow dance out of your brother, so I think that's a start."

Auggie leaned his forehead down to meet hers, a grin tugging at the side of his mouth as he tried to picture Rhett doing anything that resembled dancing. "What did I do to deserve you?"

Her lips rose to meet his. "I'm not sure that you do, but you're so damn hot that I just can't help myself."

He kissed her, holding her as though she may vanish if he let go. Slowly, they found their way back to their seats. New beverages awaited them. Auggie worked more slowly on this one, his right arm draped around Annie's shoulders as she snuggled against him, her own three drinks lowering her inhibitions just a bit.

Just before 11, a TV came to life above the bar, broadcasting the ball drop in New York City. Realizing they still had an hour before midnight, and finding Annie's fingers already fiddling with his belt, he leaned into her. "You want to get out of here?" he asked, not entirely sure that they could, but if she agreed, he'd pretty much die trying.

"Yes," she breathed against his neck.

"Where's Troy? Or Max." He wasn't sure which of his brothers would be the least drunk.

"I'm not sure. Dancing maybe?" Annie hypothesized as she slipped back into her coat and pulled Auggie's from the back of his chair. They scanned the dancing area on their way toward the exit.

Gabby Dawson saw them heading in the direction of the door and sent a nearby Matt to head them off.

"You guys heading out?" Casey asked before the other couple made it into the street.

Auggie nodded. "You guys have a great place here, but we're going to head back to the hotel. Will we be able to get a cab?"

"Maybe not. But it's not far. Let me give you a ride."

"Oh, no. That's not necessary," Annie protested. "We don't want to chance you missing New Year's with Gabby."

He smiled, a flush rising to his cheeks. "I'll be back in plenty of time for that."

Matt led them to Gabby's car parked just down the street from the bar, and they slid into the back seat together. Before they knew it, they arrived at the hotel, and Matt pulled up to the lobby door.

"Thanks a lot." Auggie offered as he and Matt shook hands.

"Glad to be of service." Auggie reached for the door handle, but Matt stopped him. "How long are you guys in town?"

"Just a couple more days. Why?"

"Clarke can usually hook us up with Hawks tickets, but there isn't a home game for another week" Matt explained. "We'd be glad to have you and your brothers tag along."

"I'm heading back with Max on Friday, so I'm not sure that will work out this week, but that would be great when I make my way back through."

"Well, let Clarke or me know if you're going to be in town anytime during the season and we'll see what we can do."

"Thanks, Matt."

"No problem." He turned to Annie, too. "It's been great to meet you guys."

"You, too, Matt," Annie agreed. "Thanks again for the ride, and please let Gabby know how much we enjoyed the bar. Have a Happy New Year!"

Annie and Auggie exited the car and walked hand-in-hand to their room. At the door, Auggie pulled the keycard from his wallet.

"Why don't you do the honors?" he suggested. He heard the lock click open and followed her into the room. She headed immediately for the bathroom while he found his way to the table just inside the door where he'd stowed his bag. From the side pocket he produced a portable speaker and attached his phone. Soft music filled the room.

"Trying to get me in the mood?" She crooned as she tiptoed up behind him, boots gone but otherwise still fully dressed.

He'd chosen a Mingus album at random with a flick of his fingers. The vibrations of the bass reverberated through the room. "It seemed like you were sufficiently motivated a little earlier," he pointed out, comforted in the warmth of her body against his back.

"Oh, I still am," she agreed. "We're inside now, though. Why don't you take off some of your clothes?"

"I was going to suggest the same to you." He turned. Hands on each other's buttons and zippers, they fumbled into the main room toward the bed. Auggie sat back as his knees hit the edge of the mattress, pulling Annie onto his lap. She shrugged out of her jacket and let it drop to the floor. His fingers trailed down the slightly prickly skin of her arms before she crossed her arms and pulled the tank over her head. She shifted a bit and eased his sweater over his chest before she started on the buttons. At the same time, he reached around and unclasped her bra. Her fingers found his belt.

"Bathroom first, okay?"

She slid off his lap. "Sure." He didn't immediately stand but instead ran a hand through his hair and across his face in contemplation. She realized they hadn't really given him the lay of the room yet. "Can I?" she inquired, surveying the path from the bed to the bathroom.

He tilted his head to the side and raised his eyes to where she stood. "I hate to ask, but slightly drunk and sorely disoriented really isn't a good combination." He reached for her hand, and she kicked their clothes and shoes out of the way. She could clean things up a little better while he was inside. "Toothbrush?" he asked as they approached the door.

"By the sink at one o'clock. Toothpaste is beside it."

"Thanks."

She raised up on her toes to kiss his neck. "Hurry. Well don't, but you know." Once he closed the door, she scurried around the room, picking up and folding their clothes. She had the floor clear by the time he emerged from the bathroom, jeans draped over his arm, wearing only his boxer-briefs. Annie had discarded her pants as well, opting instead for a t-shirt of Auggie's she'd stuffed in her bag at the last minute.

"You don't feel naked," he grinned as his hands found her.

"I got a little cold."

"Come here," he retraced their previous route easily and found the bed. He pulled back the covers and sat.

"Not yet." She stood in front of him but hadn't yet joined him on the bed.

He frowned, sensing something amiss in the tone of her voice. "What's wrong?"

"About before," she started.

"Not now, Annie." He closed his eyes again. "Let's focus on something else tonight."

"Like?"

"Like both of us getting in this bed." She took a deep breath and started to speak, but his hand on her arm stopped her. "Please?"

"Okay. Yeah." She climbed up beside him. "If you'll do one thing for me first."

"What's that?"

"Find a new song."

"Is there one in particular you want?" He knew that there was. Although she'd never actually said it, he noted that when she was controlling the stereo or turntable, one song received way more airplay than the others.

"Prayer For Passive Resistance."

He smiled and shook his head as he reached for her again. "That's just wrong you know."

She scooted closer and placed her head on his shoulder. "I think he had a good idea that people would be doing what we're about to do to his music when he named the songs, even this one."

"It's only about 8 minutes long," he pointed out as he reached for the bedside table where she'd deposited the speaker and phone while he had been in the bathroom.

"That sounds about right," she giggled.

"Very funny," Auggie huffed in mock indignation as he moved the two of them further up on the bed and then back against the mattress.

"Well, if you think you need more time than that, put it on repeat," she reasoned. "I do love you, you know?" she added as he lay beside her, their fingers laced together.

He turned his face toward hers, fully content in the moment here with her. "I know you do. And I love you, too." His watch beeped, signaling the hour. "It's a brand new year."

"That it is," she agreed as she kissed him again. "Happy New Year, Auggie."

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

The ringing beside Auggie's head pulled him quite unceremoniously from sleep. He didn't recognize the number the phone squeaked in his ear, but in his line of work – even in his current state of limbo – he was never in a position to screen calls.

"Hello?" he managed, his voice thick and gravelly. He swung his legs over the side of whatever it was he was sleeping on and tried to get his bearings.

"Auggie." Annie sounded much more awake than he did, but she didn't try to control the wobble in her voice, even in that one word.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry to wake you."

She was stalling. "Are you okay? What time is it?" By now he'd recalled that he was sleeping on the couch in Max's living room in Nevada.

She paused for a second, calculating the time difference. "About 3:30 there, I guess. And I'm fine."

"What's going on?" he tried again. Quick processing told him it was 6:30 in the District, but he realized that's not where Annie was.

"I know it's so early, but I wanted to you to hear from one of us and not from the news." She sighed deeply. "Henry's dead."

A million questions flooded his mind. He managed to voice three. "What? When? How?" Then he added a fourth. "Can we talk about this on the phone?"

"Yeah. The news outlets have picked up the story and plan to lead with it this morning. CNN may already have it as Breaking News.

"As far as what happened, the details are still a little sketchy. The best we can piece together so far was that he had a meeting scheduled with someone from his legal team yesterday. Only it wasn't any member of the American Bar Association who actually showed up. It looks like somehow during that meeting the other man – we're still working on who he is – passed Henry a cyanide capsule. The guards found him in his cell this morning."

"How very Cold War of him," Auggie spat.

"I'm sorry, Auggie."

"He was always a coward, as most bullies are. Makes sense that he'd take the coward's way out of this."

Annie's end of the phone remained quiet save for her breathing for another moment. "By avoiding a trial lots of stuff will stay buried."

"That could hurt us, you mean?"

He could almost hear her nod. "There are things that we've all done that others wouldn't understand." She knew he knew that, but she sighed again. "I keep thinking that this way, he _can't_ hurt us anymore. I've been so conflicted since Calder called, but honestly, knowing that there's no way he'll be freed on a technicality or inadmissible evidence or something like that is a bit of a relief."

"I know." He first feeling was not relief, but he didn't feel like discussing it with her over the phone before 4 am.

"Are you okay?" She wished she'd been with him when he heard this news.

"I'm fine," he lied. "Are you? I tried your apartment when we got here last night."

"I'm good. I'm safe."

Her words confirmed his previous suspicions. "Where are you?" he asked, attempting to be as non-committal as humanly possible.

He interpreted her silence as her thinking of how to answer diplomatically. Finally, she gave up and spoke. "It's need-to-know Auggie, and…"

"And I don't. Got it." The reality of the change was proposing for their life smacked him squarely in the gut.

"I'm sorry." He could tell that she really was. "This is going to be weird, isn't it?"

"We'll figure it out. We always do." He assured her. "Eventually."

She laughed a breath. "Go back to sleep."

"Right. Totally going to happen."

She sighed again. "Try, though."

"Be safe." That would probably be as easily guaranteed as him falling asleep after this conversation, but he knew she'd try, too.

"Always."

He severed the call, not ever able to bring himself to say goodbye to her on the phone in the five years they'd known one another. And now he found himself in Max's stark living room at 3:45 am without the possibility of sleep. Max kept some gym equipment in the other bedroom, but he wasn't really interested in waking his brother just yet. Instead, he dropped to the floor and alternated between sit-ups and push-ups for the next half hour. When he'd regulated his breathing and heart rate a little, he located the cane on the floor beside him and crossed to the kitchen to try to find something to drink. After opening and closing about six empty cabinets and recalling that the fridge held only beer, he decided to utilize the sink sprayer.

Max found his brother bare-chested and slurping water from the nozzle attached to the hose when he arrived to investigate the rattling and banging that had awoken him. "Hey," he spoke as he approached.

Auggie jumped, nearly dropping the hose, but he kept his hand on the sprayer, and the water kept spraying. Except not into his mouth. The liquid splashed across the counter and onto the floor. He released the hose and reached forward to shut off the faucet. "Did I wake you?" Knowing he had, he added, "Sorry."

"It's okay. I'm a light sleeper these days." He surveyed his sweaty brother and the water now all over the kitchen. "Are you okay?"

Auggie nodded briskly. "Annie called, and then I couldn't get back to sleep."

"Is she okay?"

"Yeah. Fine." Auggie turned to face his brother and leaned back against the counter. "Henry Wilcox killed himself last night."

He heard Max's sharp intake of breath. "Shit."

"Yeah."

"I know how much you needed him to go to trial."

Auggie shrugged. "He had access to a lot of information that wouldn't have done anyone any good if it became public knowledge. They would have offered a deal to take the death penalty off the table to avoid everything a trial would mean. This way he got what he deserved." This was the version of acceptance Auggie had been trying out for the past ten minutes or so.

"Or you're thinking that he got the last word in this, and that infuriates you."

Auggie lifted his head toward Max and smiled. Maybe he and his brother weren't such strangers after all. "Something like that," he nodded. "Exactly like that, actually."

"Hold on for a second," Max said as Auggie heard his footsteps retreating down the hall and returning a few minutes later.

Auggie ran his hand across the counter. "Sorry about the mess."

"It's fine." Max brushed him off, heading into the living room. "Where's your gear?"

Auggie frowned. "What gear?"

"Shirt, pants, jacket, running shoes, that rope thing Annie told you to bring." He called from the other room as he carefully rummaged through Auggie's bag.

"What?"

Max arrived back in the kitchen. "Well, I don't know about how well you sleep, but there's no way I'm getting any more right now. And you're already a mess, so I figured we might as well run."

Auggie nodded, mouth agape. "Yeah. That'd be good." He took the clothes and shoes and followed Max to a dining room chair where he sat to put them on. Once fully dressed, he accepted his brother's elbow as they headed for the front door. Max directed him to the passenger side door of the Jeep. "Where are we going?"

"There's a track at the high school a few minutes from here. I'm thinking that will be safer in the dark. Even I can't see the pot holes out here right now."

"Smart thinking." Auggie didn't relish the idea of breaking an ankle while running off steam.

Max broke into his thoughts a few moments later. "Annie called this early?"

Auggie nodded "She's on assignment, though."

"You know where?"

He shrugged and shook his head. "Somewhere in Europe, I think, but apparently I don't need to know that right now."

"Hm," Max mused. "Do you need some pointers about how to cheer from the sideline? Because I'm your guy for that."

"I'm already well-versed in life on the sideline." Auggie knew he sounded a little pouty, but he was allowing himself a few hours of wallowing.

"Except when you're working," Max pointed out. "And I'm guessing you usually work with Annie."

Auggie sent a sad smile in Max's direction. "I don't think I've thought this completely through yet." It hit him again how many similarities he and his brother shared despite the distance between them over the years.

"Take some time to see what it's like on this side. You might eventually like it."

"Maybe." He laid his head back against the headrest, not convinced in the slightest. "Thanks for doing this."

Max coughed to clear his throat. He understood many of the emotions his brother had to be sifting through, but Auggie would have to figure this one out in his own time. For now, they'd just run. He looked over at his brother with a wan smile of his own. "Anytime, August."

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"Wait, you gave her your car?" Max asked as he righted the Jeep that has swerved slightly into the left lane during this revelation. "A '67 Corvette?"

"It seemed like a good idea at the time. And I was hung up on another girl I was about to ask to marry me. It was complicated." Auggie tried to justify.

They were headed west on I-80 just past Reno when Max asked for the whole story, or what Auggie could tell him, anyway. They'd made it as far as Parker and the Corvette as they passed signs for Truckee and Lake Tahoe.

Max glanced over at his brother, wanting to tread lightly but also feeling the need to point out what apparently wasn't so obvious to his brother. "You've not always made great decisions regarding women, Auggie." The younger man kept his eyes front, silent, so Max continued. "I know I can't say much about recent history, but Rhett, Troy and Brendan have been around, and they've seen you repeat this pattern."

Auggie frowned, recalling his confrontation with Troy regarding his choice to volunteer for active duty after he arrived home. "I know." Another thought struck him. "Do they think that about Annie?"

"Of course not, but that appears to be no thanks to you – the guy who tried to dismiss her with a car for her troubles."

"It really wasn't like that," Auggie protested.

Max shrugged, eyes on the road. "Whatever it was like, you could have lost her."

Auggie drew a ragged breath. "You have no idea."

"And I know you can't tell me the whole story. Or any of it."

"The details don't matter, but yeah. You're right."

"I know you came out here to get away from things back there, and I haven't been a part of your life for a long time, but I'm still your brother." Max pointed out.

"It's okay. A little annoying," Auggie let a little smile escape, "But okay."

"So now what?"

"We get married."

"No, the other part. What are _you_ going to do?"

"I don't know." Auggie shook his head again.

Max tried another approach. "What do you_ want_ to do?"

"Not be a burden on her."

"Stop it." Auggie turned, a little surprised by the sudden edge in Max's voice. "You're not pulling that with me. I'm not the others, and neither is Annie. We didn't see you when you were down and out, and maybe that's a good thing. You are a grown-up version of that driven guy I've known my whole life – nothing less. And her first impression of you was completely on your terms, so I can imagine how that went.

"That girl does not feel sorry for you Auggie. She admires and loves you. And she doesn't doubt you. At all. You're human, and humans have weaknesses at times. Okay. She's aware of that. But she's also had the opportunity to watch you work. I know I can't understand everything about that, but you've always been impressive. You don't do things poorly or half-assed or even adequately. You're exceptional, and you always have been. That's what she sees in you. That's what people see, Auggie. Not the cane. Not anything else."

"Max." Auggie stretched the name into two syllables.

"I'm not trying to blow smoke up your ass. I don't know what I expected when I showed up at your door that day. Maybe that you'd have been knocked down a couple of rungs or something because of this, but your essence is the same. You're a leader and a visionary. And maybe that's what chapped my ass so much about you having the success you had in the Army. You don't take orders if you don't agree with them. And in fact, people seek to follow you because they believe in your ideas. Annie believes in you. I believe in you."

After a quiet moment, Auggie spoke. "That's not why I came, for a pep talk."

The tone of Max's voice had warmed toward the end. "But it doesn't hurt, does it?"

Auggie smiled finally. "I guess not."

"I can't imagine doing what you've done – then, now, ever. Most people don't go outside their comfort zone, Aug. They don't honestly think they can make a difference in the world. That's never crossed your mind. You've always done what you wanted – whatever you set your mind to do. Some people would call that being an over-achiever, but for you it was just what you expected of yourself. I have to believe that this junction in your life isn't going to be any different."

Auggie frowned. "It's a lot harder now. Change is harder."

"I'm not saying that it isn't, but what I am saying is that's never stopped you before."

"But I'm so tired of pretending," he managed in a strained whisper.

"That's life, Auggie. Most people are pretending that they aren't miserable or afraid. Well, some people do it better than others." Max looked over at his brother and shoved his arm lightly. "Maybe you have changed a little. You've realized that the rest of us exist."

A look of apprehension or maybe even guilt crossed Auggie's face. "Was I that bad?"

Max chuckled, almost ruefully. "You were always so focused and ambitious. And I get that, but you didn't have much use for people who weren't on the same trajectory as you."

"So all of this, the estrangement, it wasn't just about Sam." Auggie voiced what he'd long suspected.

"I guess not," Max acquiesced.

Auggie started again. "But what if this is my chance for a new start? After I left rehab, I went right back to what I'd done before. Things have gone well, but I still feel that shadow of who I might have been if things had gone differently. What if I want to get away from all of that history, and what if this my opportunity?"

"Do you really think that changing your employer – but not actually your job – will make that happen?"

Auggie shook his head with a little sigh. "It does sound stupid when you put it like that."

Max laughed a breath. "I'm just saying it out loud."

"Since you're dishing out wisdom today, what do you think I should do?"

"Well, it seems to me that you're valuable where you are. I'd leverage that for exactly what you need. That gives you time to get things moving for your own firm if that's what you want."

Auggie opened his mouth to protest but then closed it again. After another moment he spoke. "I don't know if I can do that."

"It's not the Army, Auggie. You can ask for better conditions, hours, pay, a promotion. It's okay to do that. You _should_ do that."

"Everyone else is working as hard as I am."

"I doubt that."

"It's not the way things are done there."

"You want them to give you a couple more medals that they can put back in the vault?" Auggie turned toward Max, eyes questioning. "Everything you all do isn't as big of a secret as you think it is."

"They didn't have to take me back." That remained the real issue, even after all the years and missions and successes back at the Agency, Auggie still felt beholden.

"But they did, and I'm sure you've more than proven your worth to them over the years since. There's a lot of turnover at the top, right? You should figure in there somehow." Max didn't know details, but he knew his brother.

"Before, maybe." He shook his head again. "There have been opportunities, but it's not right. Nothing is right."

"Did you ever think that maybe this unrest you're feeling isn't about work?" Max pushed a little more.

"Who I am there, that's always been my true self."

"Has it," Max noted in more of a statement than a question.

"It's been yours too," Auggie insisted, drawing on all he remembered of his older brother.

"No. It was for a little while – when we last knew one another, but things have changed. I think they have for you, too, but you've not made that shift in thinking yet. You're going to be married, Auggie. Your decisions aren't only about you anymore."

"But Annie,"

"Puts herself in danger in exotic locations and you wish you could go with her? Yeah. I'm familiar with the concept. Who do you think has a longer life expectancy – an American spy in Paris or a western journalist in Pakistan and Iran and Syria?"

"Yeah. Okay. Point taken."

They drove in silence for a long while after that, Max noting the firm set of Auggie's jaw and he rested his head against the cool glass of the window. Just before Sacramento they stopped to stretch their legs and grab some lunch. Auggie took Max's elbow as they headed toward the door.

"I'm not trying to be an ass, Auggie."

"I know."

"Change is not easy. I'm not sure that I'm ready to be retired – whatever that means at 39, so maybe I'm projecting."

"It's okay." Auggie offered as they took their seats. He faced Max across the table and smiled again. "No one else will push. Everyone's fine with status quo because I'm good with that. But even Annie walks on eggshells when approaching change. We've been talking about getting a place for what, seven months, but she has a pretty good idea of what that means for me. Same thing with a new job or a new city or anything else."

"Still, I'll stop if you want."

Auggie shook his head. "No. I need it. I needed this week."

Max reached across the table and placed his hand on Auggie's arm. He'd missed his brothers terribly, Auggie especially. "I needed it, too."

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Less than two hours later, they pulled up behind the condo. They exited the Jeep and Auggie shook out his cane. "Well?"

Max smiled as he beheld his new place. "Welcome to The Haight."

Auggie paused a second, taking in his surroundings. "Feels dark. Sounds paved. And it doesn't smell the best, either."

"We're in the back alley." Max walked around the car and arrived at Auggie's side. "The yard is just through here," he directed, pointing his brother toward the fence.

A door behind them opened, and a clean-cut man in his early 40's stepped into the alley holding a trash bag. "Can I help you guys?" He asked after he deposited the bag in a nearly full dumpster at the dead end of the street.

Max and Auggie turned. "How's it going?" Max asked, as the other man approached. "I'm Max Anderson, and this is my brother Auggie. We're the new neighbors. Well, I am, anyway. He's just here to help unpack," he added with a smile and a hooked thumb directed toward Auggie.

"Adam Braverman," the other man said, wiping his hand on his pants before extending it first to Max then accepting Auggie's outstretched one. "My brother and I own The Luncheonette, which is a recording studio and not a diner. We share the alley here."

"Good to meet you," Max smiled. He could imagine Auggie's interest in the studio as he cast his brother a sideways glance.

"Can I give you guys a hand with unloading?" Braverman approached the car.

"We don't want to impose," Auggie spoke finally with a quick shake of his head.

"No problem at all. I've got some free time, and we're neighbors." Adam grinned with a quick shrug. "What can I carry?"

Max handed over a box of fragile household items to Adam and a duffle that could be worn on Auggie's back, leaving his brother's hands free until he got the lay of the land. They started through the yard and arrived soon at the back door. Max unlocked it and reached to the right to flip on the kitchen light.

"You can leave that on the counter or the island," Max told Adam as they entered the room. Auggie moved to the side and stopped. Max turned to him. "The floor is totally clear if you want to explore and get your bearings. That bag can go in the first room on the right at the top of the stairs."

"Okay," Auggie's face brightened, pleasantly surprised that Max wasn't holding his hand. He headed into the main living area to find the steps. "Nice to meet you, Adam," he called over his shoulder as he disappeared into the next room.

Adam stood, hands in his pockets. "You have another one?" he asked. Max nodded and they started down the back lane. They made it back to the car before Adam asked the question that Max had already come to expect.

"Has Auggie," he paused, "Always been blind?"

Max realized Adam had chosen his words carefully to be as unobtrusive as possible while still inquiring. He shook his head. "No. He was injured in Iraq back in 2007."

"You're military, too?"

Max nodded. "Navy. Just retired. My fiancé and I are moving in here together. He's back East working. We were all just at our parents' for Christmas, and I persuaded Auggie to come out here for the move. His fiancée headed back to DC for work, too, but he took a few more days to help me out."

"Well, sounds like you two have things pretty well covered, and I have to be honest with you," Adam said as he grabbed another box. "Our last neighbor here found us and our patrons a little too rowdy for her tastes, and it did get a little nasty. We try to keep an eye on everyone, but the musicians come out here to smoke – not always cigarettes, if you know what I mean – and we park back here, too. If we're in your way, please let us know and we'll do whatever we can to fix the issue."

"I appreciate your candor and box carrying, but I'm sure we'll be able to coexist just fine." Max decided. "Especially if you let Auggie listen in on any jazz recording you may have going on over there. Sam and I have pretty eclectic and varied tastes, but Auggie's a jazz man all the way." Max had found that out in only spending a few days with his brother.

"I'll be sure to keep you all abreast of any jazz situation," Adam chuckled, relieved by this exchange.

As they arrived at the back door, they met Auggie on the porch steps. "You good?" Max asked, guessing he probably was if he was coming to them.

"Yeah," Auggie confirmed. "What's next?"

"The hatch is unlocked, and there are about three more boxes and a couple of bags in the back seat."

"Okay," Auggie made his way down the lane to the car and nestled a box in his left arm with one of the bags slung over his shoulder, leaving his right hand free for the cane. The others deposited their second load and joined him. With Adam and Max's third trip, the car was effectively emptied.

"I'd offer you a beer," Max started, "But we don't have any yet. And the moving truck should be here in another hour or so."

Adam shrugged. "We have plenty of beer at The Luncheonette, and there's a good little Vietnamese place around the corner if you need to grab some dinner later, too."

"Aug?" Max inquired.

The younger man shrugged. "Why not? What are gonna do here? We don't even have chairs."

"Good answer," Adam agreed with a smile before he led the brothers back across the alley. Before they entered the recording studio, Auggie stopped at the back door.

"I'll be there in a minute. I just need to make a couple of calls."

"Yeah, sure. We'll be just inside the door," Adam verified.

"Thanks." Auggie waited until he heard the door close behind the two men before he called Annie's apartment. He disconnected when her voicemail message started. He then tried her primary cell. When he had no answer there, either, he thought about dialing the number she had called him from previously but instead decided on Calder.

"Michaels," the other man answered brusquely, as was his style.

"Calder. It's me."

"Everything okay?"

Auggie chuckled. "Yeah. For once."

He heard Calder's voice drop about an octave as he relaxed. "Well, good. What's up?"

"I need to come in."

"To work? Or for something else."

"That's what we need to talk about."

"Okay. Fair enough."

"I need to talk to her, too." Calder started to speak on the other end, but Auggie stopped him. "I just need to know when she'll be back. Approximately."

"Three days. Four tops." Calder gave him the information he needed. "Will that be enough time?"

"It's fine." Auggie sighed. "Have you talked to Joan?"

"She'll be back on Monday. As DCS."

"And you're going…"

"Back."

"To Colombia?" Auggie asked, confused.

Calder laughed. "No."

"Oh. Right." The DPD.

"When are you heading back this way?" Calder asked, bringing things back to Auggie.

"Tomorrow. Or Wednesday. I'm not sure yet."

"Well, she won't be back until Thursday at the earliest."

Auggie considered this. "I'll fly back Wednesday, and come in on Thursday. I want to know what my options are." He felt like the whole thing might go a little more smoothly if Calder had some idea about what he wanted to discuss.

"Okay. See you then."

"Thanks, Calder."

"Safe travels, Auggie."

They hung up on that note, and Auggie found the door right in front of him. He pushed through into The Luncheonette. "Max?" He spoke as he entered the quiet room.

A new voice, a female one, greeted him. "You must be Auggie." She walked toward where he stood. "I'm Amber, the niece-slash-assistant. Apparently your brother has been pulled into the recording booth, and I'm supposed to take you there." She stopped in front of him. "How exactly do I do that?"

Auggie smiled. Most people tried to grab him in some way or another. Neither of their new acquaintances had done such a thing. "If you touch the back of my left hand, I can find your elbow. Walk normally and I'll adjust to your pace. Just don't run me into a door jamb."

"I'll try not to do that," Amber agreed as she followed his instructions perfectly. They headed toward the studio. "We have a group recording their debut album."

"Are they any good?"

He felt Amber shrug. "They're not bad, but you can decide for yourself. They're about to start their session."

"It's almost four."

"Musicians don't really keep a 9 to 5 schedule, you know?"

"Of course not. How silly of me." Auggie grinned; he liked her energy.

They arrived at the booth where Adam and Max had joined Adam's brother Crosby. Adam made introductions and Amber grabbed a water for Auggie as he settled into a chair and accepted a pair of headphones.

A bit later when the moving truck arrived, Auggie stood to go with Max, but his brother stopped him as they exited the booth. "Why don't you hang out here? I'm just going to tell them where to put stuff."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. Maybe figure out something for dinner while I'm over there, though?"

Auggie nodded. "Okay."

"I have some menus at my desk," Amber jumped in. "Meal runs are definitely in my wheelhouse." She rummaged through a drawer. "Or." She paused, looking up, "If you were up for it, I could take you around the neighborhood and you could choose what appeals to you most."

"You're sure you have time for that? I don't want to disrupt your day anymore than I already have."

"No, it's totally fine. I'd kind of like to stretch my legs a little, anyway."

Auggie nodded. "That'd be great. I can pick up a few things for Max's place. You know, the essentials – toilet paper and beer."

"And a shower curtain and hooks. People always forget those," Amber added.

"Should we make a list?"

"Nah. That's probably enough." She reached for her coat. "How about we scope out a couple of places for dinner? You pick and we order; then we hit the convenience store about two blocks over for your essentials."

"Sounds great." They exited the studio and turned left, heading up a slight incline. They stopped outside a little noodle shop when Amber stopped abruptly and he ran into her shoulder. "What's wrong?" he asked, dread suddenly rising in his throat.

"Nothing," she answered quickly. She really hadn't meant to alarm him but saw that she had. "I just hoped I could ask you some questions and just suddenly worked up the nerve to do it."

"Okay." Auggie let some breath escape but still held a little expanding his lungs. "But is there a coffee shop or something around here so we aren't just standing on the street. Unless that will cause you to lose your momentum."

"No. Yeah. Here," she managed as she started walking again, this time faster. She nearly pulled him through a doorway where they were met with warmth and delicious aromas. "Do you want anything?" She asked as she directed him to a table. He found his own chair.

"No. Let's sit." Her chair scraped the floor as she did. "So what can I answer for you, Amber?" He had a few ideas about the topic of conversation but wasn't sure which way she was going to go.

"My fiancé, well, he was my fiancé but he went back. He said he couldn't live this life. But he said it was horrible there, and if it was, I just can't understand, even still, why he would go back." The words tumbled from her mouth. She sucked in a deep breath once the last one escaped her and then remained silent, but he could practically hear her questioning gaze.

He considered his answer for a long time before he settled on an answer. "I don't know, Amber. I'm sorry, but I don't think I have any great wisdom for you. It was a long time ago for me, but there's barely a day that goes by that I don't think about my guys. I haven't talked about them with almost anyone but my therapist in years, but they are always with me. The fact that they aren't still there and I physically can't return is probably what has allowed me to transition back here with some success. But if I could've and if they'd been there, I'd have needed to go back, too.

"It's hard to explain if you haven't lived through it, but you feel a camaraderie that comes from a shared experience, and at least for me, the knowledge that you're part of something bigger and more important than anything I'd ever done before." He hadn't voiced this in at least five years, and then only to Ben Rosen. "I don't know if any of this helps, but it may be less about not wanting to be with you and more about how difficult it is to fit into the mundane again."

Amber sat so silently, he was afraid for a second that she'd left him. Finally she spoke. "He had a lot of anxiety. And anger."

Auggie nodded. "It's taken me years to get where I am, and I'm still not the same person I was before. Obviously." He smiled. "But it's even more than that, you know?"

"I think I do," Amber whispered.

"Annie, my fiancée, doesn't know everything still. And there are things I don't want her to know, but I think that if she does, eventually, she'll understand me better." He paused then, considering the alternative with much trepidation. "I hope that's what will happen." He shrugged anemically. "I have to put my faith in her."

"He didn't trust me enough to let me in," Amber asserted.

"Maybe. Or maybe he couldn't bring himself to open up enough to show you his vulnerabilities." Auggie countered. "It takes time to build faith in someone else, even someone you love. Sounds like he wasn't ready to do that."

"Is there anything I can do?"

Auggie exhaled a long breath before he gave a slight shake of his head. "I don't think so."

"That's what I thought."

They sat a few minutes longer before Amber was ready to go. They completed the rest of their errands and were heading back across the alley as they passed the moving truck turning onto the street. Max met them at the fence.

"I was just coming to look for you guys," he revealed as he relieved Amber of the case of beer she carried.

"Then we're just in time and with dinner," Auggie grinned, turning to Amber. "Can you join us? There's plenty."

"I'd love to, but I'd better get back to the studio. They'll be at it a little longer, I'm guessing."

"Well, thanks for all your help today. I really appreciated you taking the time," Auggie offered.

"Are you kidding me?" she exclaimed, wrapping her arms around a surprised Auggie, then reached up on tiptoes to kiss his cheek. "I'm the one who should be thanking you."

"Let's call it even," he suggested, the blush not quite yet fading from his cheeks.

"Deal," she agreed before bidding them both good night and heading back to the Luncheonette.

Max glanced at his brother in the encroaching twilight but just shook his head. He was going to leave that alone. Instead, he unburdened Auggie of some of the bags he was carrying, and they made their way through the back yard and into the house.

"I'm sorry I didn't help with any of this," Auggie lamented as he placed the bag containing their dinner on the newly-arrived table and started pulling out boxes and paper plates.

Max sat an opened beer at both of their places. "It's fine. There's plenty more to do. Sorry to abandon you like that with the neighbors, although seems like you got along famously."

Auggie shrugged. "It was nice, actually. Amber's great. She gave me a tour of the neighborhood and helped me decide on dinner." He opened a container of rice and scooted it to the middle of the table. "Her fiancé is Army. And he just re-upped." That wasn't the whole story, but it was information from which Max could draw the necessary inference.

"Yeah? She seems so young."

"She is. But I get the sense that she's wise beyond her years or something like that."

Max took a seat across from Auggie and started filling his paper plate with steaming Chinese food. "So what's the plan?"

"What do you mean?" Auggie asked, his mouth full of egg roll that he washed down with a swallow of beer.

"Your phone call earlier. I could see the wheels turning when you walked into the room over there."

Auggie pushed some broccoli in brown sauce across his plate. "I'm going to grab a flight on Wednesday, if that's okay. I'll be here to help you out tomorrow, though."

"Nah. I'll be fine. Get home and do what you need to do."

Auggie looked up and in Max's direction. "Are you sure?"

"Yes." Max took a pull from his own bottle. "I'm guessing they can get you a flight out tomorrow?"

"I'll need to have someone look into it, but yeah. Probably."

That brought a whistle from Max. "Wow. You _are_ kind of a big deal."

Auggie shook his head. "Nah, I just know the right people. With computers."

They finished eating in relative silence and repackaged the leftovers for the fridge. Max set to equipping the bathrooms with Auggie's toilet paper and shower curtain while Auggie called Barber for assistance with a flight.

"You know that curtain is clear, right?" Max asked as he descended the stairs. Auggie was flicking his fingers across the screen of his phone, earbud in place as his brother rejoined him.

"Oh yeah?" he grinned. "I was more concerned about keeping the water off the floor than the view through the curtain. I promise not to look, though."

Max laughed and shook his head. "That's good to know, and I'm sure Sam will send you his thanks as soon as he gets home."

* * *

At six-thirty the next morning, Auggie exited Max's car at the Departures area at SFO under the Virgin America banner. Max came around to say goodbye as Auggie slung his bag over his shoulder and extended the cane.

"Come back any time. You and Annie both, okay?" Max wanted him to know they were always welcome.

"Yeah. We need to. We'll really try." Auggie promised.

Max glanced through the windows of the terminal and back to his car in the unloading only zone, feeling a little guilty now that he hadn't parked. "You'll be okay getting to the gate?"

Auggie nodded with a grim smile. "People are always willing to help."

They hugged. "Safe flight," Max managed, his voice breaking a little.

Auggie nodded and clapped his brother on the shoulder, wanting to get on his way before he started to show more emotion than he was comfortable with in public. He managed a clipped "thanks" before he started toward the door, wiping the corners of his eyes as he headed off to find security.

TBC

* * *

A/N: I felt like this one got a little indulgent, but Rachel Wilder assured me that the indulgence was justified. Although she did suggest I add a transitional scene which required me to watch 3 episodes of Parenthood today (such a hardship) which became Auggie's conversation with Amber. And maybe that got a little indulgent. But I think I can get him home without encountering the characters of any more NBC shows.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Here's a bit more. I'd love to hear your input.

* * *

Chapter 7

A little after 3 pm Auggie exited the terminal at DCA and headed toward the taxi stand, kicking himself for not calling his car service. But it was too late for that now. He slid into the back of a cab and gave his address. He briefly considered changing the destination to Langley but thought better of it as they turned onto his block. He paid the fare and nearly jogged up to his place. This was the longest he'd been away from the apartment since he'd come back to DC.

When he pulled open the sliding door, the scent of home wafted over him. Surprisingly, the air wasn't stale or closed-in. Auggie inhaled deeply. He'd missed home. After a moment in the doorway, he pulled the door closed behind him before crossing into the kitchen and opening the fridge. Instead of the bare shelves he and Annie had left behind, they felt well-stocked. He ran his hand over a container on the top shelf. It was labeled and dated, too. As he pondered who would have done this in anticipation of his arrival, his phone rang in his pocket. Teo. Auggie smiled.

"I'm guessing I have you to thank for this." He realized as he shut the refrigerator door behind him, a bottle of water in hand.

"Ah, you're home, then."

"Just came through the door."

"Joan keeps her finger on the pulse, although I warned her that this may border on stalking."

Auggie laughed. "It's okay. Thanks."

"I know Annie is out of town for a few more days still. Can you join us for dinner?"

He started up the stairs to the bedroom. "Tomorrow maybe? I think I need some time to decompress tonight."

"Of course," Teo agreed easily. "Joan's trying to savor the last week before she goes back. We're free whenever you are."

"You doing okay?"

"It's going slowly, but it's going, I guess."

Auggie couldn't help but notice the wistful tone Teo's words took here. He decided not to push for information about the other man's recovery. "I'm supposed to meet Calder on Thursday, but I'm going to see if he can do it tomorrow instead. I can stop by afterward."

"Is your driver back?"

"I have to call him, too." Auggie's early arrival had even further ramifications.

"If you need a ride, I can help you out with that tomorrow," Teo proposed.

"You're driving? That's something," Auggie offered.

"I have no idea where I'm going about 80% of the time, but you wouldn't need to know that."

Auggie laughed again. "I'll call you tomorrow."

"Get some rest and let me know if you need me."

"Thanks, Teo."

Auggie drained the bottle of water and dropped his bag on the bed. He undressed and then stepped into the shower. After a few minutes under the spray, he toweled off and raided his drawers for a pair of shorts. Finally, dry and somewhat dressed, he fell into his own bed for the first time in almost two months.

He woke some hours later hungry and disoriented. As he regained his bearings, he reached for his bedside table and his alarm clock. It was after 9 pm. Keeping days and nights straight wasn't something his body always did on its own anymore. His illness and their recent time-zone skipping hadn't helped at all. He figured he'd need a week or two of Ambien to straighten himself out. He hated taking the stuff, partly because of the bizarre dreams and partly because of the hangover it left. Still, he realized the need to get back into a reasonable schedule as he prepared to return to work and grudgingly headed into the kitchen.

He raided the fridge and found a turkey sandwich on the middle shelf and another bottle of water in the door. He ate the sandwich while standing over the sink, and after retrieving an Ambien from the cabinet above the phone, he moved into the living room. He selected an album from the shelf basically at random and placed it on the turntable. He smiled when the music of _Mingus Ah Um _trickled through the speakers. He felt oddly energized through the first song but felt the seep aid and the slower tempo of "Goodbye Pork Pie Hat" lulling him into drowsiness only a minute or two later. He briefly debated heading back to the bed and turning off the music before he fell asleep again.

The scratching of the needle against the vinyl made him aware of his location when he woke again. He wasn't sure what time it was, but the wooziness he felt when he sat up told him he hadn't been asleep long enough. He reached across and switched off the turntable before heading back to his room. He brushed his teeth and found his way to the bed. He hit the top of the alarm clock. Thankful that it was only 4:30 am and he had hours before he needed to be awake, he collapsed back onto the pillows and let his eyes close again.

The third time he woke, he finally felt rested. The hour was just after 8 am, so he tried Calder as soon as he held his phone in his hand.

"Michaels."

"It's Auggie."

"You're back."

"Yeah. Can you work me in today sometime?"

"Sure." There was a pause on Calder's end of the phone. "How about 2:30? I can squeeze you in there. You'll be on the books, so just come on up when you get here."

Auggie rolled his eyes but held his voice in check. "Yeah. See you then."

He called Tommy, his driver, who apologetically revealed that he was still in New Jersey with his family for another day. Tommy offered to find a replacement, but Auggie declined. He placed his third and final call of the morning to Teo. The other man sounded very much awake.

"Auggie, hi."

"Hey. Can I take you up on your offer for a driver?"

"That's very much to the point."

"Sorry, but it's too early for small talk."

"I'm fairly sure that 8:30 isn't early for you."

"Not usually, but I've been on hiatus for almost two months. I have to get back into the swing of things gradually," he chuckled.

"Makes sense," Teo laughed. "What time do you need to be there?"

"Around two. Is that okay?"

"Yeah. I'm on my way to therapy now. I'll be done in an hour."

"Okay." He heard Teo take a breath to speak but didn't say anything more. "Teo?" Auggie pushed.

"Would you mind if I came over there a little early? When I'm finished with therapy, maybe?"

"Sure."

"I could use some time in the company of someone other than Joan and the baby," the other man explained without any further solicitation from Auggie.

"That bad?"

"We'll talk later. I have to go in."

"Okay. I'll be here. Whenever."

Teo arrived a little after eleven. "Can I grab a shower?" He asked, almost immediately after entering the front room.

"Sure." Auggie pointed the way, kind of enjoying the ease in this exchange. The years had strained their relationship, but they'd begun to rebuild what they'd had before. That and his renewed closeness with Max allowed Auggie to hope that more good things were on the horizon for him and for Annie. He'd been so skeptical about optimism for such a long time that it still felt like an uncomfortable stretch, but he _was_ trying.

After a quick shower, Teo joined Auggie in the living room. Auggie noticed that the crutches from before had been replaced with a cane. "Seems like you're getting along well," he noted as Teo took a seat on the couch beside him.

"I can't complain. Well, I could, but it really doesn't do any good." He laughed without humor.

"You're alive, and that's better than the alternative," Auggie pointed out through pursed lips and with a slight dip of his head. "I usually try to start there."

"How are you feeling?" Teo threw the focus of the conversation right back on Auggie.

"Better. Stronger." He nodded with each word.

"You're going to talk to Calder today about going back."

"Or not. I wanted to discuss real options with him and with you and with Annie." He realized in saying this aloud he was accepting that he was no longer an island. John Donne would have been so proud.

"I've talked with Arthur. He's definitely interested in what you proposed but thinks it will take us six to nine months to be operational." He sipped the water Auggie had brought for him. "His feeling is that you can be as involved in that process as you want, but also if you choose to keep going where you are, you can cross over at any time that suits you – as a full partner, of course."

"I can't even invest while I'm still at the CIA," Auggie pointed out.

"We're okay for money, at least for starting up. If you decide to come in later, your investment stake can come then, too."

"I-I-I don't know what to say." Auggie stammered. "That's more than I would ever, could ever have asked for."

Teo smiled and placed his hand on Auggie's knee. "I know. That's why I'm offering it. I owe my life to you and Annie multiple times over. So do Arthur and Joan and the baby. Let us do this for you."

Auggie sat in silent contemplation for a long moment. He hated asking for help, even before, and definitely more so now, but he needed this. He wanted it – for him, for Annie, for what could be their future. Finally, he looked up. "Yeah. Okay. Thank you."

Teo broke into a broad smile and stood. Auggie joined him and the taller man pulled him into an embrace. "Wonderful." They stepped apart a few seconds later. "I'm starving, and it's supposed to be in the 50's today. Let's grab some sandwiches and stretch our legs before you meet with Calder."

"Sounds like a great idea." They grabbed their coats and headed out together.

Predictably, Teo chose the Mall near the reflecting pool for their leg stretching. They'd each used it as a meeting point with Arthur and other contacts over the years. It held more significance for both men than they cared to admit.

"So what's up for real?" Auggie asked as they found a bench and unwrapped their sandwiches.

"I need to ask you for a favor."

"Anything." Auggie meant it.

"I need to find my own place."

"And you want my help?" Auggie asked, a little confused.

"No. I want your apartment." Auggie opened his mouth, but Teo stopped him. "Hear me out, please. You and Annie need to get a place together, and I know you've been dragging your feet on it, but your apartment is a home for one person. Not two."

Auggie thought about what Teo had offered him earlier regarding the consulting business and then his request now. Somehow, Auggie was making out very well in both of these deals. He shook his head and smiled. "I think we can work something out." He grinned thinking of Annie's probable reaction. "And I know Annie will support your proposition."

"Seeing you two together and Joan and my father with the baby, it makes me think maybe I can have that too. Maybe I got another chance for that reason."

Auggie shrugged. "I'm by no means an expert, but if it could happen for me, surely it could happen for you." He hoped it could, but they'd both endured so much. Their way of life didn't usually lend itself to dinner party conversation with nice girls. Or girls who weren't spies.

"I'm sorry about Helen. Both times," Teo whispered.

Auggie nodded but didn't answer. He inhaled and then exhaled through his mouth. It was still a difficult subject. He didn't think that would ever change.

Teo glanced at his watch. "It's almost one. Should we go?"

Auggie nodded again and stood. "Think Calder will let you all the way up to the 7th Floor?"

Teo chuckled. "You'd be surprised where they let me go now."

Auggie raised an eyebrow. "Oh yeah?"

"I have my own badge and everything."

"Someone is definitely moving up in the world."

Teo shook his head as he fell into step with Auggie. "Oh, I'm moving alright. Just not always sure that it's up."

Auggie stopped and grinned broadly at his old friend. "Welcome to the real CIA. We conveniently leave out all mention of the red tape when recruiting assets."

"I honestly think it was easier to be an undercover warlord operating out of a Colombian jungle."

Auggie laughed and took his friend's elbow as they started again toward Teo's car. "Yep," he affirmed. "That sounds about right."

TBC


End file.
